Monday, January 10, 2011

Friends outside of the computer

Everyone inside the computer tends to refer to their “real” friends as “in real life friends”.  I am pretty confident that everyone I talk to exists in real life…. so I don’t really like that phrase.

Going with my theme from the other day, we will just call them outside of the computer friends! 

Because you are all my friend in real life!

I have gone through a really shitty interesting spell here the past year-ish with my outside the computer friends. 

Some shit went down and at the end, my best friend wasn’t my best friend anymore.  That still hurts, even though we do talk somewhat now. It’ll never be the same and I hate it.  One of my other bestest friends moved to FL last year, and we just don’t talk much. My fault as much as anyone else's, and neither of us are phone people. I miss her. A lot.  My oldest friend (25 years we have been besties!) and I have just kind of grown apart.  She is going through some IF issues, and I am sure being around me and my kid aren’t the easiest thing in the world some days.  I just want to be there for her, and sometimes I feel like I can’t/she won’t let me.  Again, I hate that. I miss her too and she lives close to me.

I promise I am not that big of a loser, I do have other friends!  And we do see each other/talk on the regular. And I love them tons.  Most of us have been friends for over 10 years, which I think is pretty amazing!  Some friends I don’t see nearly enough, but damn life is always getting in the way of that.  And not everyone lives close, so that always gets in the way.  Maybe I need a teleporter machine?

It is definitely true that I need to make hanging out with my friends more of a priority than I do.  Or at least raise it a rung or two on the priority ladder.  I do let too many other “things” get in the way, legit or not, of socialization.  I’m working on it!

Then there are all the other amazing people I surround myself with.  Some of them are inside AND outside of the computer friends – how lucky am I?  We DO get to have play dates and coffee and wine and dinner and funny text message conversations.  I would be very lonely without these ladies, that is FOR SURE.  My cross-over friends, the ones who exist in all aspects of my life, are the newest friends in my life and I am so grateful for them.  I don’t want to get all mushy and stuff, but really, they are fabulous.

Talk to me about your outside of the computer friends.  Are they old friends, new friends, people you talk to lots or just a little?  How much “friend” time do you have a week? a month? 



dayna said...

As a mom you know it is hard to stay in touch and keep up with everyone's busy lives, that is why I love facebook I can check in when it is convient for me and see what's been happening and they can do the same. Usually once a month we will plan a time to go eat and have a girls "night". If it was not for facebook I would feel so out of touch with people. There are a few people that have blogs and I keep in touch with via the computer so I enjoy that also as I am a stay at home mom and don't have much contact with other adults throughout the day.

alison said...

I've definitely grown apart from most of my friends over the last few years. My 2 best friends are 3 and 5 hours away. Which sucks, badly. Our best friends here are a couple with 2 kids - they're actually j's friends from forever, but I claimed them. :) I sort of like having a few really good friends rather than 90 mediocre ones like I used to. I wish my inside-the-computer friends lived closer, for sure.

Kakunaa said...

I have friends all over the country, some of whom I haven't seen in a decade and still consider to be very close. I don't get hang out time much, though. But I hope to change that....

Rebecca said...

Friends are hard right one's schedules mesh!

We're trying to get a girls afternoon/night together with shopping and dinner...that will be in February with the three of us that are in the area. I'm also seeing one of those girls on MLK day for a clothes swap. Then we're trying to plan a Girls' Weekend in September for all of us (even the three that have moved away), but it's just getting all screwed up b/c people want different locations...blah!

JJ said...

I honestly have more friends inside the computer--which is OK with me--since I get to see those friends every now and then. I dont see my BFF from high school hardly at all.