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Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Hats

Gianna has been totally into hats lately. EVERYTHING is a hat and she should always have one on. Or make something into a hat. Or a bow. Or a shoe.  Really, she enjoys accessorizing. And, I can’t say I blame her… shoes (and jewelry) make an outfit after all.

I know I already talked about how being at home was unexpectedly busy.  And ya, WOW do I feel like I am running a race that doesn’t have a finish line some days.  But it made me think of all the hats that I have to wear right now.

Hat #1 – Mooommmeeeee

I’ll take this one any way I can get it. I seriously LOVE being home with her a million times more than I ever imagined. I get to teach her things, play with her, dance with her, discipline her etc.   And it’s kinda fun. And totally flipping adorable 89% of the time.

Hat #2 – Wife

Again, I’ll take this one any way I can get it. It’s very strange for me to be the one at home, totally a new dynamic in our relationship.  We are working on the transition, but I think it’s good.  And I couldn’t ask for a more supportive husband.  We are both scared and know the future is uncertain, but we’re a team which means it WILL be okay. (or better than okay)

Hat #3 – Business Owner

Since I started this journey with Premier Designs I guess this one qualifies!  Starting up a business, staying organized, getting people to believe in you (especially this part) is HARD and it’s a HUGE challenge.  I figured it would be hard, but I didn’t imagine the disappointment  when the people you *thought* would be there to help and lift you up are no where to be found.  Thankfully there ARE some awesome people lifting me up.

Hat #4 – Student

Freaking school is stressing me out.  Not because this semester is filled with lots of work, because it is considerably LESS work than the past year, maybe that is the problem. It’s actually making me LESS organized (right, I know that’s weird) and I feel like I am forgetting something. And also freaking out about getting all the paperwork together for my big capstone project next semester.  It WILL get done. And I can.not.wait.

Hat #5 – Homeowner

Losing ones main source of income kind of puts a damper on this one.  And makes things like paying bills, finding health insurance (holy shit is it RIDICULOUS to pay for insurance out of pocket), putting gas in the car and all those things we take for granted a little more difficult.  Again, STRESSING ME OUT. (and, I still haven’t heard about my unemployment application, so again, S to the T R E S S)

Hat #6 – Job Seeker

Despite the above mention of business ownership.  I know that this stay at home thing won’t last (breaks my heart a little).  Unless a miracle happens. Which, I am not hopeful.  I would LOVE to work part time/from home but who knows.  Job applications suck. I am over educated and under experienced for a lot of positions. Or at least it seems so…..  It takes a lot of time. And, more frustration and can I get an S …. T…. R…. E…. S… S….Goooo TEAM….. ::jazz hands::

Hat #6 – Just Me.

I have to think about me. Or at least I should. Most days I forget to eat until Gianna is napping, I skip working out to write/do homework/clean etc.  I haven’t had a haircut since May and my eyebrows (and err. upperlip) are screaming for attention (no, they really probably are….). This is the last hat I ever put on.  Which means it’s collecting dust somewhere in my closet….. Hopefully I can dust it off soon.

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5 comments:

Esperanza said...

That's a lot of hats to wear! I'm glad you're loving being home. I actually have to go back to work soon and I'm not looking forward to it. Though I might be more when I get this month's check (or lack there of)...

Esperanza @ esperanzasays.wordpress.com

Kakunaa said...

Many, many hats. But just think, you get to enjoy them in ways you don't normally get to. I know it's stressful...trust me, I do. But you are an amazingly dynamic woman and you should be proud. I need to do my eyebrows, too :)

JJ said...

Creative and TRUE--at least our hats are stylish, right? :)

Rebecca said...

You need a day of beauty! I completely got a visual of your upper lip hair screaming at you...at least your head is always warm, right??

The Sourwine's said...

It's hard being a mother... especially a stay at home mom and student. I'm doing that now. You have no idea how much harder things get when you're down to one income... you get to lose all those little luxuries you once took for granted. I miss it a lot sometimes... but I wouldn't change missing my kids milestones for the world. I missed so much working full time [2 jobs] going to school full time and trying to raise a daughter on my own... I missed every single one of Kaylee's milestones and I will forever regret it. Enjoy these moments hun and try and take a breather once in a while. I joke all the time that I've become the frumpy housewife that I never wanted to be... but alas, our health & beauty come last when it comes to our children's well being, correct??

Hang in there love, I have full faith in you and your beautiful little family. What stresses you out now will give you something to look back and laugh upon later. You guys will do just fine!!