Manic Monday

there are a number of things i feel like i need to get off my chest today - few of them related.

exhibit a) friends, big mouths and hurt feelings
i have been trying to be ok with something for awhile now, everytime it comes up i really just don't say much or use a casual expression about the situation. but in reality - my feelings are hurt - more than i expected or want to admit to i guess. if you don't want a person who has been your [best] friend since you were 5 to be in your wedding, that is ok - but a little statement along the lines of "we are keeping it to a small bridal party", "just family" anything along those lines would be ok (even if it's a lie).... make me feel better... It's not the 'being in the wedding' that I am disappointed about - of course I want to be there for her (i did throw them an engagement dinner just because i love them) through this time in her life, it's the outright ignoring the fact that hurts my feelings i think. So i won't open my big mouth (verbally) about it - but I will tell you - internet - about it.

exhibit b) baby strollers, maternity clothes and feelings
something a little happier - at the mall yesterday mike said the cutest thing to me. We were walking around and saw the display @ motherhood maternity - mike said that i would look cute in one of their shirts if/when I get 'my' baby bump. it was just nice to hear from him, since he always says that he doesn't know what he will think of me whenever i get pregnant! He also said he is noticing all the strollers out in public these days - and can't wait to push one around. awww... some day!!! (now calm down uterus and we can do some work together...) We also talked about how much we laugh - and how great that is!

exhibit c) mom talk
as in a talk with my mom.... it was a good one. we finally are on the same page. I understand where she is coming from and she understands where I am coming from. She doesn't want me to leave my (future) babies at a babysitter/daycare because she hated having to do it - me either but that will be my life, i know this, it's my reality. I am ready when it happens but enjoying every day with my husband.

exhibit d) same friend, more hurt feelings
she is graduating - very proud of her (it's a great thing to get your degree!) it's also her bday in a few weeks. so i got her a gc to her fave resteraunt to take on vaca with her - its from me and my sister. had sister give it to her yesterday so she would have it in time (and heard horror story of mailing gc!) no thank you's. but you are welcome anyway. i don't do things b/c i feel obligated - i do things b/c i want to, b/c i like to - and b/c everyone deserves to be remembered on special occasions, by their friends. the appropriate response when someone hands you a card is not "what is this for?" it is, "thank you for remembering". i'm sorry we don't talk much anymore - busy life - but i still have a good memory, still care etc.