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Thursday, June 16, 2011

Thinking Things Through

I have been “unemployed” since October – using that term lightly since I sell Premier Designs Jewelry, freelance write and teach & have been doing 2/3 since October. Putting those three incomes together I make well over what I was brining home from my full-time position, in a LOT less hours.

And I get to stay home with this spunky girl.

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Watching her grow, teaching her things and really ENJOYing her & enjoying being her mom. I have always LOVED her, but when I saw her for only about an hour a day – the most stressful hour of her day (dinner/bath), after my own stressful day at work – typically there wasn’t much fun or enjoyment to be had.

Since October and really since graduating last month, I have turned up the job-searching to find a full-time position, because, that stable income and better health insurance would take a lot of [financial] stress of both Mike and I.

I had an interview last week for an 8-5/M-F position, it went well (haven’t heard back yet) and sounds like it would be a good opportunity. My biggest hang up? It’d be at least an hour drive each way & I haven’t worked 5 days a week since BEFORE I had Gianna (compressed work week was the best thing about my old job) and I don’t know that I want to make that commitment again if it’s not the exact right place to be. There’s no way to know, of course, if it would be the exact right place to be unless I got the job.

Working M-F comes with it’s own stresses though – daycare costs, missing time with Gianna/family, going back to that unbalanced feeling I had before.

I don’t know what is right (or even really what I WANT!), clearly I will do whatever I NEED to do for my family, regardless. I have been in such a state of “what’s next?” that it’s starting to blur the lines in mind of what I want, need and what a good option is for everyone.

My belief is that family comes first, work comes second – praying that I can stay true to that….

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7 comments:

renee said...

This is such a difficult decision to make. Hang in there and I'm sure you'll do what's best for you, Mike and Gianna.

Sara said...

I'm a big believer that everything happens for a reason. You got to stay home with G and finish up your degree and explore other ventures because that's what you needed to do. Now, if this job is going to benefit your family, it will work out. If not, then the perfect job will come along. And you'll know it when you see it! Good luck, whatever happens!

Anonymous said...

Ditto what Sara said!

Anonymous said...

Praying that it all works itself out for you all! :)

Danifred said...

So hard. I hope you are able to find your answers. Thinking of you!

Anonymous said...

Praying your next opportunity is a company that also believes family comes first - they do exist! :) I have a 40 min commute each day, and I actually enjoy the drive (though not the gas or the miles put on my car). I work for someone who is extremely flexible and I end up only being away from home from 8-5 (I work a shorter work day than should be allowed...). If it doesn't feel right, wait for the one that does. I know things will work out for your little fam! :) xo

Rebecca said...

That's tough...I hate long commutes. What made you take the interview in the first place? Just wondering...