Tuesday, October 30, 2012


We are always talking about finding balance in life.

But I have to tell you a little secret – balance? it doesn’t really exist. Because life is constantly shifting and changing and throwing off that balance that we so desperately seek on a constant basis.

To find true balance would be like running your whole life on a teeter totter or something. When I heard someone speak on this, it made so.much.freaking.sense to me.

so, stop trying to find balance. unless you like living on a teeter totter.

Start striving for harmony.

A place where we can accept the and easily mold our experiences to those constant changes and challenges that happen in this little thing called life.  Of course it’s not always easy, but knowing that things are going to change and that living in a place where you can feel ok with a bad day (or week) because it just IS that way makes the next good day (or week) that much sweeter.

As a woman who works full time, works part time, is a wife and a mother, is a daughter, sister, aunt and friend – I struggle every day to remain in a place where I feel like I am giving my best self to all of the people and commitments in my life. Where I personally feel harmonious. It’s a conscious effort, really.

So some days in my life, harmony means not worrying about the laundry for (another) night. Some days it means getting to work early so I can finish a project. Some days it means keeping all forms of technology put away so I can enjoy my family. Other days it means tackling my to-do list so that the next night I can focus on something more fun. And even others, it’s taking an extra 5 minutes to myself in the shower to relax.

Harmony to me is when I feel like I did a good job at giving everyone I encountered that day the attention they deserved.  If this happens more days out of the week than not, it’s a win.

Because there are days like today, where nothing goes right, nobody gets the attention they deserve, I end up crying at work because all I want to do is be at home and not have to worry about making up hours or using vacation time to take my kid to school and am a grumpy mess when I finally do make it home.  These are not the days I am proud of, but they happen.

The good part about bad days is that they end. And tomorrow, I get to pretend to be just another preschool mom for a few hours at Gianna’s harvest festival before going to work for the rest of the day. 

Things around here are more stressful lately, there is a lot going on, schedules are as crazy as always with no slow down in sight, life is happening all around us and a lot of days I feel like I am teetering on the edge of not being able (or wanting) to handle one more thing in my life.  I feel isolated a lot of days, like I don’t have anyone who could possibly understand my frustrations, fears, needs, wants, etc. Which is silly, really, but it is what it is and I let myself get in the way of my own harmony the majority of the time. 

Harmony is a funny thing because it is based on perception, it is the pleasing combination of elements, and beauty tends to overshadow the blemishes. Remembering that little bit of information isn’t always easy – but all I can do is try to live in harmony as a general rule, accepting the bad days as they come and cherishing the good days as they are happening.


Anonymous said...

I think you do a fabulous job! Love, Mom

Deborah said...

I like this concept of harmony rather than balance. Some days different areas need more attention than others. But overall, it does all fit together in the end. When you listen to harmonic music, there are moments of tension and then resolution, too. It's a great analogy!

Photogrl said...

You are amazing!

That's the thing with life, it never stays within the lines we set for it.

I recently blogged about rhythm in life, kinda of along the same lines as this post. I think most of us worry that we aren't measuring up, yet those who love us would totally disagree with how we feel, you know?

Meghan said...

I could have written this! Good to know I am not the only one struggling hard with balance. Great blog - just came across it from Jen's!