Monday, December 8, 2008

click click boom

I know i have been bitching a lot lately about how busy/crazy/stressful life has been lately - and it is in fact all of those things. I have been a very big crab lately - pretty much bitching at anyone who looks at me wrong because why the hell would you look at me like that? My tolerance for things that I don't feel like doing/hearing/seeing etc. is pretty much non existant and I fully realize this. i am sorry for being a hormonal, crazy bitch most of the time - but honest to goodness I don't even realize I do it until after the fact.

So all that being said - I need to stop freaking out about things that I can't control at this moment or my head is going to explode.

Example - omgwhatif: the house sells and we have no where to live b/c I am off work, my boss suddenly decides he hates me and fires me, i have to go on bedrest, we don't order the baby's furniture in time, my friends won't want to hang out with me once the baby is born, we won't be able to afford for anyone but the bag lady to care for our child during the day, my cankles blow up so big i can't put my shoes on..... ya you get it huh?

Half legit but half just absolutly insane!

i know that everything will work out perfectly in the end - whatever definition of perfect we choose to live in. I just have to get my ass in gear with my ten mile long to-do-list and maybe that will take my mind off of all the what-ifs that continually poor through my mind.

The only thing that makes me feel better is the kicks that I can feel from this little one (until of course I think about how this little one is going to get out my warm uterus and ohmygodiwillbe responsible.....)


Jacqui (favorite aunt) said...

well at least you know that if you do get kicked out you can stay with me, and i will always hang out with you and i will watch your baby, becuase of course it will want to be with the favorite aunt,me, all the time. and well just pray your cankles dont blow up.!

kristina said...

well i for sure will not hang out with once the babies born............but i will hang out with the baby :)

alicia said...

it is sooo hard to stop freakin out! everyday there is a new thing to freak out about, and it will get worse once our babies are here! becuase we can't protect them inside anymore! so i think there will always be things to worry about, I guess the key is finding a healthy balance! haha easier said then done.

but you are right, it will all work out perfectly! just keep thinking that :)

kristina said...

and just for the record...i am so the favorite aunt :)

Mel said...

I completely understand your stress and I am in the exact same place... It is so scary to wrap our heads around just how LITTLE control we have over things right now. Just remember, things always work out. They just do. I was reading a pregnancy book the other night and the chapter was about the fear of labor and delivery and it said that if you leave the hospital with a baby, then it's simply doesn't matter how it happened because you've accomplished the ultimate goal. So simple but so true.