i know it's not friday but....

My husband is awesome!!

the bathroom is finished.
the house is clean.
the christmas decorations will be put away tomorrow.
the new house decorations are hung up.
i got a foot rub when i got home from work.

He has been so incredibly supportive and understanding of everything lately. When I am tired, he tells me to go to sleep. When I am hungry, he makes me something to eat. When my feet are fat and swollen he doesn't care if I just sit on the couch all night. When I am frustrated with things that have nothing to do with him or us or anything at all, he lets me vent and gives me a kiss. When the baby kicks, he runs to my belly to feel too.

What more do I need in my life?

I love him.

Merry Christmas!!

I wanted to take a second to wish everyone a Merry Christmas!!

This year we have so much to celebrate and so many people to celebrate with - we are a truly blessed family and without Him none of what we have would be possible.

Enjoy your holidays, your families and the food!!!

update on the little one and the mommy

24wks here we come.....
So I had my appt today - it went fine. I have apparently gained more weight in a month than I should have, as the first thing he said was "I see you ate well over the holiday..." oops? I don't feel like I eat too much - but the baby is really loving oreo's and milk...every night... that could have a thing or 2 to do with it? So i should cut that out.. and probably the weekly (or biweekly) high calorie coffee drinks? He said overall he is not that worried but to just be careful. Ok doc, no christmas cookies for me I get it!

I am measuring perfectly he said. The little one was "slightly girl" today - as has been the case with all of our appts. (I am a bad mom and never remember to ask what exactly that heartrate is!). To this comment he got a swift kick in the hand - not sure if it was in agreement or disagreement but it was perfectly timed!

He said I look pregnant too... is that a compliment? I thought I have "looked" pregnant for at least 10wks now! You be the judge....

I would also like to draw your attention to the bellybutton.... it expanded quickly and now is rebelling against the karate chops that can be felt for most of the day.

I have this other problem... swollen feet... very swollen feet. Since my b/p was high today I figured I should mention this to him. (not worried about the b/p, there was an ice storm last night and I get very nervous when I have to drive on shitty roads) He said it will get worse before it gets better and to "get horizontal" as much as I can.... ok I will have to tell my boss I must lie down at work?!

these lovely ankles are the product of wearing heels to work... I know they don't look THAT bad, but you should have seen them as soon as I got home - my maleoli (or ankle bones) were completly hidden by puffy pregnant cankles! and my toes look like unpainted sausages..... stay tuned for more exciting pictures such as these in the weeks to come :)

Overall, i'm great, baby's great. nxt up - christmas and then my glucose test.

my husband rocks

He totally does. as usual.

we are pseudo-homeowners as you well know, but we have real homeowner repairs and issues to deal with. our masterbathroom toilet overflowed this weekend and he took it like a champ, cleaning, repairing, etc. In the not so distant past he would have pitched a fit over such things - my how far he has come :) I am proud of him - he takes great care of us.

He is also very excited for school to start next month and I am very excited for him because I know how long he has been looking for this. We will make it all work beautifully in the meantime right?!!

Looking forward to another week of amazement and happiness........ and maybe a fresh new bathroom!

Chin Up

you know, kind of like glass half full?

I promised to post about this last week and got busy/forgot. The husband got some motivation and decided on something that may be great for him. He is going to be starting at a school for broadcasting in our area - it's accredited in the field and is a 10month program with high job placement. Everything will get finalized tomorrow for him to start in either jan. or feb. and I know that he is really excited about it. I am very proud of him because I know he is going to do great, that it is something he loves to do.

I also mailed in my application for the masters program I hope to get accepted into for next year. It's something I have wanted to do for a long time and whether or not I go back to medical school it is something that I want to do. March I will find out for sure if I got in.

A few other things that have made me really nervous lately are working themselves out in a way, which is nice.

The little one is practicing gymnastics in my uterus as of late - it's a really strange feeling! One thing that I have started to notice is my belly button.... first it got really flat.... now it is starting to poke out a little bit, but only on one side. I hope it goes back to it's cute little self when the expansion is over! Mike is getting even more excited about becoming a dad and that in itself is a pretty amazing feeling. As much as I worry about all kinds of things - as my mom told me today - we will fake it until we figure it out! (but I think we have some good role models, so I am not that worried!)

Attempting to keep the chin up as much as possible these days.
besides, it helps disquise the "pregnancy" double chin I am sporting.....

christmas past, present and future

I was catching up via my googlereader this am and saw a great post by Amy.

My favorite christmas traditions from when I was little:

-- going to my great aunt mary's on xmas eve for all the traditional italian food and family

-- getting our stocking "bags"

-- christmas morning breakfast = cinammon rolls, (recently french toast casserole) egg nog, oj

-- taking turns to open presents & show off each one (we have continued this even though most of us are grown up and out of hte house, we always go to my mom's for christmas morning!)

-- playing the christmas light game while driving around

-- cookies! - and now chocolate covered goodies.

-- leaving cookies and milk for santa with a carrot for the reindeer

-- going to see the christmas tree display after thanksgiving every year

i am sure there are more, but it's early!

Traditions I want to start with our little one: (and some that we do already!)

-- family pictures each year on christmas (and before for the cards!)

-- opening one present on christmas eve

-- reading a christmas book on christmas eve before bed

-- watching the classic xmas movies (this one is for daddy!)

-- continuing the christmas morning breakfast!

-- seeing santa

-- mailing/receiving letters from santa (you know, when they are older!)

-- having christmas at our house

i'll have to see what Mike wants to do too -- he loves the holidays!

(little one, you certainly have a lot to look forward to next year!)

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and today is a very special day. it's my mom's birthday!!!

we got her something fabulous and I can't wait until she sees it. It has been another very wonderful year for her and she continues to give me a lot to live up to in the mom department.

how i am feeling and how my day is going (and subsequently how i look).

I have a cold.
it won't go away.
it's make me cranky and irritable (ok more so than I was before).
I feel bad for the people I work with - they probably think I am effin crazy. Literally I started crying because someone gave me attitude back about something - not in front of them, but close. Can you say sick, hormonal pregnant lady on the loose? I bet there are a few ppl in this office that can.....
ugh. I should totally just go home like everyone keeps telling me too - but alas, I am also a stubborn, sick, hormonal, pregnant lady.

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on a side note - I am very proud of my husband. More on that tomorrow......

click click boom

I know i have been bitching a lot lately about how busy/crazy/stressful life has been lately - and it is in fact all of those things. I have been a very big crab lately - pretty much bitching at anyone who looks at me wrong because why the hell would you look at me like that? My tolerance for things that I don't feel like doing/hearing/seeing etc. is pretty much non existant and I fully realize this. i am sorry for being a hormonal, crazy bitch most of the time - but honest to goodness I don't even realize I do it until after the fact.

So all that being said - I need to stop freaking out about things that I can't control at this moment or my head is going to explode.

Example - omgwhatif: the house sells and we have no where to live b/c I am off work, my boss suddenly decides he hates me and fires me, i have to go on bedrest, we don't order the baby's furniture in time, my friends won't want to hang out with me once the baby is born, we won't be able to afford for anyone but the bag lady to care for our child during the day, my cankles blow up so big i can't put my shoes on..... ya you get it huh?

Half legit but half just absolutly insane!

i know that everything will work out perfectly in the end - whatever definition of perfect we choose to live in. I just have to get my ass in gear with my ten mile long to-do-list and maybe that will take my mind off of all the what-ifs that continually poor through my mind.

The only thing that makes me feel better is the kicks that I can feel from this little one (until of course I think about how this little one is going to get out my warm uterus and ohmygodiwillbe responsible.....)

my husband rocks

i think i missed last week - sorry!

Things (as you know) have been rough lately - but he does still manage to rock on a few occasions. He took care of a bunch of stuff for me this week which was nice.

He also still thinks I look beautiful and makes sure to tell me that every single day - that is a very big help and a very big deal to me! He told me that he loves me more now than the day we got married - I about burst into tears because I thought that was so sweet!!

Even though things are hard right now - we are still going strong.

scared?

There is a LOT going on right now. baby. work. studying. life. you name it - it's happening at the same time. typical.

We just had our saturn in the shop for a new effing transmission - thank god we were persistant and got the information to qualify for a warranty extension so saturn covered the cost - but my husband has been w/o his car for over a week. He will be FINALLY picking it up tomorrow. Without a car (or rather his suv) he can not work. Nice timing.

I have got to start studying - and I have. just not near the capacity that I need to be. I am sucking it up and talking with a learning specialist tomorrow after work about how to go about everything this time around while working full time and carrying a child. Should be interesting and I am looking forward to having a plan. I am nervous over this whole thing - but i KNOW that I have to do it - getting over my fear and nerves may take me longer than going over the material.....

Suddenly I am more scared about finances than I have been in a very long time. I was "offically" hired by my company today (was working through a temp service) which is good considering the economy is going down the shittter but it brought about a few things. 1) i am not getting a raise until after my maternity leave - um that blows. 2) my maternity leave is unpaid -as expected - but sucky regardless. it can also be as long as I want up to 3mo, but I can't afford to be off work at all let alone 3 months! we will discuss the specifics once it gets closer. 3) health insurance comes out of my pay (duh!) which I did not think about until now... and I need to figure out the best way to figure out the insurance situation which includes a lot of number crunching by the first of the year.

I have no idea what to do about daycare, daycare costs and all things related to this. I can't even wrap my head around it. If I go by a standard of $200/wk - it would be next to pointless for me to work (w/o a raise) but I can't NOT work... talk about a rock and a hard place.

We have to pay off our credit card, buy nursery furniture, start saving for when I am off work (hah!), figure in my student loan payments (which start in feb... go figure), plan for a few bridal showers & weddings & extra baby stuff, buy christmas presents..... overwhelmed much? why yes I am thanks for asking....

OOOHHH and the newest discoveries as far as body morphing to accomodate baby - my hands are swollen and I had to take my wedding rings off last week. (granted I have tiny hands, my rings are a size 4.5 and usually big) I hate not having them on. Last night - I discovered just how much my feet are swelling... I had elastic marks from ankle socks. awesome. cankles at 21wks....

ugh life.