I am not a stranger to being pulled in what often feels like a million different directions and juggling a lot of responsibilities. In fact, I am good at (for the most part) keeping it all together and do a better job when I have a jam packed schedule.
Throw a newborn into the mix of our already crazy lives and take me out of work for 8-12 weeks and I feel like I am totally in uncharted territory!
And the juggling doesn’t always feel like it’s going so well. I am tired a lot, so that never helps anything. I am also not used to being home so much – it is great, so please don’t get me wrong – I am ADORING spending this much time with my girls especially knowing this is such a finite experience for us. It is all just very different from my “old” normal.
It is HARD to juggle the needs of an independent almost-four-year-old who still needs (& craves) a lot of mama time with the needs of a six-week-old who also needs a lot of mama time, and who does a lot of crying. Add on top of that feeding said children (and myself), making sure the house isn’t overrun by toys, dishes, laundry and dirt and also making sure the children are not overrun by dirt and we have food in the cupboards - my head spinning a lot of the time. It is getting better (or I am caring less about certain things) and some days it is easier. Other days – it is just pure chaos!
admittedly this whole 2 kids thing is a lot harder than I expected. probably because I was SO used to our little routine and was away from the “newborn madness” for so long. Aleesia is finally starting to get on a bit more of a “schedule” which is a huge blessing. Gianna is finally starting to figure out her big sister role and how this all works – and that we all need to work TOGETHER. All of these things make the juggling a bit easier, but I still pretty much always feel like I am forgetting something important. Because I usually am. I rely HEAVILY on my phone to keep me organized! Technology, FTW!
Part of me hates to start to feel any kind of “normal” right now though, because I know as soon as I settle in to a routine it’s going to change drastically when I go back to work. I will be setting up my part time schedule next week (for April 1) and I am dreading it because I don’t want to go back yet but also looking forward to it in a lets-just-get-this-over-with-already kind of way.