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Friday, May 11, 2012

Friday night leftovers: emotions

(I am posting from my phone, so ignore the typos, autocorrects and formatting issues!)

My little sister turned 21 yesterday. Freaking nuts. It doesn't so much make me feel old, but it's just strange!

One of my closest friends is going through (or rather, watching her toddler go through) something so unimaginably heartbreaking and scary that it almost seems pretend. But it's not. And I am so deeply scared and shaken up by this I don't know how to describe it. I know it's not happening TO me, but still, I can't help but to feel this way. It's unfair in every sense of the word.

When people around me are hurting, I want to DO SOMETHING. But this time, the only thing I can do I pray.

I am going to have a niece! I am equal parts THRILLED and angry because I'm not pregnant. These are hard emotions and feelings for me to swallow/accept/understand.

Speaking of unfair, another good friend is struggling with newly diagnosed melanoma and again - it is so so awful not to be able to DO SOMETHING. ugh.

I have been so conflicted and randomly emotionally about our struggle to get pregnant lately. I can't really explain it, but it making me nuts.

On that note, no one can make me feel better/forget all the stress of life like Gianna can. I am so grateful for her.

Here's to another insanely busy weekend.

2 comments:

MommyV said...

Here's hoping & praying all of the situations you mentioned turn out for the BEST. Little A is a fighter. You are doing something by praying, by loving on J and helping out where you can.

alison said...

Sending you so, so much love. You're a do-er and I know it's helpful to contribute, but don't forget to take care of yourself. I hate to see you hurting with everything that you have going right now.

So thankful for you. xo