Wednesday, February 20, 2013

The Transition

It’s been a short 19 days since we went from a tiny family of three to a party of four.

newborn 1

Photo Credit: Janet Miller Photography

Aleesia is adorable.  Gianna is adorable with her sister.

The dynamic of our lives and our family has drastically changed.  Obviously we expected this, but lets not be delusional here, change can be hard. 

newborn 2

Photo Credit: Janet Miller Photography

I had zero expectations of what life would be like when Aleesia arrived.  I expected it to be tough, different, maybe a little scary & maybe a little fun too.  I had total newborn stage amnesia (pretty much my only memory of newborn G involves crying & projectile puke) & knew that things would be different with breastfeeding, etc.  As far as how Gianna would react, I just had no clue what would happen.  The threenager is unpredictable.

I don’t think anyone can really prepare you for life with kids, or adding kids to your life.  It’s such trial & error and every kid & situation is unique.  So what worked for one will probably not work for the next one.   Also. Whatever your schedule/routine was – it won’t be anymore.

The truth? It has been much more challenging than I expected.  When I get the baby fed/calm/sleeping I try to spend some time with Gianna doing something she wants.  That doesn’t leave a lot of time for anything else – you know, like dishes, laundry, blogging, etc.  Especially when Miss Aleesia wakes up immediately upon laying her down for a nap.  And, much like her sister, she is hard to console when she’s upset.  We are managing, our house is clean-ish some of the time, the bills do get paid on time, laundry is always in progress & we are slowly figuring out a new normal.  I am a creature of schedule & routine so it has been hard for me to adjust to our new life.

Me being home from work is an adjustment in itself for all of us.  Being the main/only source of food for this little person is new & obviously presents its own challenges (although, thankfully it is going well).  It takes me longer to get things done because I am constantly interrupted, again something I need to start adjusting for.  But I do okay some days & we have avoided any huge schedule disruptions for G.  I’m not always sure how we all get out of the house & G gets to school – but it happens.  This week has been a lot better & more productive, thankfully.

photo 2

Then there is the tired.  You forget how exhausting newborns can be.  We have Aleesia sleeping in our room in the rock & play (which is the most amazing thing ever).  It’s quite handy but I’m ready to move her to her crib soon.  So far, she’s not been a fan the few times we tried it, but we’ll keep trying.  I forget to eat a lot, too.  Aleesia is gassy, appears to have a touch of silent reflux, and has her “witching hours” between 4 & 8pm usually.  Again, all things Ii just didn’t even think about dealing with!

Gianna sharing her parents, especially her mommy, has been the hardest thing to deal with.  She is almost four, she has had us all to herself for a long time.  So waiting for us to finish with Aleesia before helping her (she always asks for things in the middle of a feeding or crying spell) is rough.  Much defiance & talking back has ensued along with a lot of parental frustration.  It’s getting better, but I really didn’t expect her to act out so much or have such an attitude.  We are having a tough time parenting her at times, it’s for sure not always pretty but again, we are working through it.  She does love her sister and to help pick out her clothes & hold her.  She will sing to her, which is beyond adorable, and gives the best hugs & kisses.  I am thankful there isn’t anger towards Aleesia, though. 

photo 1

Overall, the transition has been quite challenging, but okay.  It is getting better/easier & I’m sure just as soon as I think I have it figured something will change! We’re figuring it out one day at a time.  And trying to savor the quiet moments as well.



Deborah said...

I could've written this post! In fact, I think I'm going to go write it now.

alison said...

I think this is the post that I would have written when Jude was new, had I thought to write a post back then. That is to say - as much as these times are super hard and trying (and magical too, I know), take lots of mental (and physical) snapshots because it will, of course, be over in a flash. Life does get easier (I promise, it does! :), but the teeny tiny sweet moments are gone forever. xo

Anonymous said...

If you don't already have one, get a Moby wrap! It lets you carry the baby and nurse the baby hands free. :)

JoyBelle said...

That Anonymous comment above with the link is most likely spam - don't click that link!

Anyway back to your post, just wanted to say I feel ya momma! As another said a wrap could really help. Sounds like she's just one of those babies that needs more physical contact than some. She is so precious and such a doll!!!

Rotten said...

I think you are doing awesome and it sounds like you have embraced the family of 4 craziness very well. Keep it up!