Sunday Random Ramblings

• I haven’t participated in ICLW in awhile, but HI! to my new friends who are visiting from there!
• Check out the about me section for the readers digest version of my life, and ask away if you want to know anything.  You can follow me on Twitter and Facebook too if you just can’t get enough here!
• This weekend I was in Columbus for the Premier Designs rally, this was my 3rd one since becoming a jeweler last year and it was just as great as all the others.  It was made even better because over 1/2 of my “team” of jewelers came with me – we had a really great time and I think they are all inspired to work their businesses to the best of their ability.
• And the new jewelry is pretty fabulous, I can’t wait until mine arrives!
• I’ve had a cold all week/weekend, I am worthless when I’m sick.
• Gianna has been talking since she woke up this morning. I mean that literally, I don’t think she has been silent longer than to take a drink here and there.  It’s awesome to hear her talk and see her imagination at work. But also slightly exhausting.
• I need my eyebrows waxed and my toes done. In a really bad way.
• We signed her up for preschool (for September). Holy shit. How is she old enough for that?
• So I decided to check on my traffic sources stats today – I am a little disturbed.  I got 45 hits from “potty poop 2011” and 9/10 of the keyword searches that landed people here had to do with the potty, pooping or peeing. What the heck? My kid is not even potty trained, this could possibly be a sign that she SHOULD be, but I still find it to be weird that of all the things I talk about on my blog – THIS is what has landed people here…..
• Our appt with the RE and Mike’s SA are both Tuesday. I filled out the paperwork and am officially freaked out about the insurance situation, but I am trying not to worry about that until someone gives me a reason to.
• Stay tuned this week for a pretty hilarious She Said post. Gianna is full of the hilarious lately.
• Happy lazy Sunday!

TTC part 2, the impatient factor

We TTC for about 9 months before we got pregnant with Gianna. It sucked as much as one would imagine, but we had no idea how awesome the outcome would REALLY be, so while it DID feel like a long road, it wasn’t one that we necessarily were ready to race down.

This time? I know how awesome being a parent is and just want to do it again. Now.

I am feeling very impatient over the whole process. Maybe it’s because most of my good friends have recently (or will soon be) having new babies. Or because G interacts SO well with said new babies. Or who knows why, really – I just am! 

I am , however realistic and I didn’t think for a minute this would happen quickly, so far we’ve had 2 unsuccessful cycles which isn’t a big deal.

I feel like it took me those 2 cycles to dig out all the information about TTC I had stored in my brain somewhere – and last month I was in a different state than my husband when I ovulated [making this week’s BFN/AF visit not so damaging].  As much as I HATE the line “it happens for a reason”, I have to kind of lean on that right now for my own sanity.

Or at least use it to ease my growing impatience because in all reality – the past 2 months were not ideal in terms of conceiving. I have a better idea of my cycles post-mirena and feel more ready to actively TTC.  In other words, it’s time to get serious!

Gianna will be a great big sister some day, and as much as having another baby scares the shit out of me – it is starting to really excite me.

Praying for patience to carry me through this journey, as long as it takes, because I know no matter the path the prize at the end is better than I can even begin to imagine.

The future makes me nervous

 I know I talked a little while ago about how I never imagined that I would be where I am today.
The other part of that story?  I am having trouble imagining the future.

Maybe that is a good thing, since we all know that life is never as we planned or imagined.

Except I am a planner. You should see my google calendar and all it’s glorious colorful organization.  It may or may not run my life.

I want to know exactly where I am going to be as far as having a new job. Buying a bigger house one day. Because I will have many more babies to fill it. And honestly people, these thoughts are overwhelming sometimes.
First step to the future? Graduation in May. That is under control and on track. And holy crap I might actually be finished being a student (for now).

Second step to the future? Finding not just a new job but a position that satisfies me professionally and intellectually. This is HARD.  I am in the process of contacting a recruiter on the matter because I don’t know where else to begin.  I know what I am looking for, I know what I am willing to bend on and what I am not in a new position. My fingers are crossed tightly that I can find someplace that meets my needs and appreciates what I have to offer.

Third step in the future? Work on making more babies. I said in my friday night leftovers that I am not physically ready. I am not. I want to get my body in a little better shape. I am there “weight” wise but flabby extra jiggle wise – no where near. Also? It took us close to a year to conceive Gianna.  While we didn’t require medical intervention, I feel that the steps we did take while TTC (while who knows if they did or did not make a difference) puts us somewhere on the line that she talks about @ Lovely Lady Bump.  I am scared to death that it will take as long or longer for #2.  Or it might not. That part of the unknown makes us nervous.  Also? having to wait for steps 1 and 2 to fall into place frustrates me because mentally and as a family – we are READY to expand. To share the love we have.  And that part is frustrating.  6 months seems like a long time to wait to even start this journey. But, it’s only 6 more months, right?

Fourth step in the future? Be a supportive wife to my husband in all that he does and in the venture he would like to undertake. It could be very good but we have a lot of research to do.  He has always been supportive of me through my educational journey and it’s time to focus on him for awhile. 

The future seems very promising yet very daunting and a little bit scary right now.  I KNOW it will all be fine, because it always is in whatever way I define “fine” at that moment. But just for a second can I have a crystal ball so I can see WHEN and HOW these things will play out?!!

Friday Night Leftovers

• Everyone needs to play along with Danifred!
• This has been a long week. I am not 100% sure why, but it has.
• I need fall clothes. Mostly because all of my stuff is too big from last year, so that is a good thing.
• Baby FEVAHHH is running wild. I am not where I want to be physically or with my job to get back on that train. But within 6 months I am confident we will get started on expanding this family. Until then I will just hunt down tiny babies to snuggle.
• Fall TV!
• Usually when I am busy, I am super productive. Not lately. Again, not really sure why.  I need to get organized. Get a plan and get my head in the damn game.
• I heard that an “old” friend is having a tough time and it makes me sad that I can’t be there for them in the same way that I used to.
• You know the stripper wedding from last weekend? It wasn’t so bad. See: But there was some HUGE drama that night and I feel bad for our friends.  We want to do something for them, but how do you do-over a wedding reception?
• And I got to hang with some GREAT friends last week see: We have been friends for a LONG time and I love them all lots.
• I have been getting some KILLER diaper deals lately, it makes me happy.

Big or little?

In the spirit of ICLW and JJ’s thoughtful Tuesday, this seemed appropriate.

You are either a Big Things person or a Little Things person.

I am a little things person. 

The little things mean more to me than any one big thing ever could.  The little things that go wrong also stay with me for longer than (almost) any big thing that has ever gone wrong.

I am a detail person. 

Life is about the details. At least it is to me.  I notice that in the pictures I take, in the things I focus on during the day, the way I interact with people.  I do my best everyday to pay attention to the details – sometimes I just like to look at the leaves and not the forest.  Makes the forest seem less dark and scary, ya know?

The little things that made today a good day:

• I forgot something at home when I left for work this morning. So I came home to get it at lunch. And I got to see Gianna. That made the rest of my day better.
• someone at work said thank you to me.
• I got to wake Gianna up from her nap when I got home and snuggle on the couch watching Elmo.
• My husband starting an after party dance party.
• I drank my coffee out of a cup my sisters got me from CA.

What kind of person are you?

Wordless Wednesday

tools of the trade part 2

new age. new tools. same great cuteness.

part 1

Supply and Demand

We all know the old economic principle of supply and demand, right?
When the demand increases, the supply should also increase and vice versa.
Can I just tell you how not true this is for my love life? (and yes, by love, I mean sex).
I am finally feeling really comfortable (most days) with how I look, where my jiggly spots still are and that my hair really never is quite right.  But? My clothes are fitting great, my shoes fit even better and my husband thinks I am hot.  So finally, after a year, I feel good.  So good in fact I bought a 2 piece bathing suit! And I think it looks pretty okay on too.
My problem though, is that The Tired is still around and more fierce than ever paired with a huge pile of work.  Work being school work, work work, house work, wife work and mommy work.  Alotta workin’ goin’ on over here.
So we have The Tired, The Extreme Tired and The Work to battle if we are going to have The Sex.  After my last discussion with the internet on this topic, we instituted weekly sex.  It honestly worked.  The Pacific replaced The Sahara and life was good.
Good ole’ supply and demand in action.
And then life got in the way, per usual.
Now we are back at square one. Or negative one. 
Why does this happen? Why can I get over one barrier (self-image) and sort of another (Sahara v Pacific) to only replace it with The Extreme Tired and The Work. 2 steps forward, 3 steps back it is.  This makes for high demand with low supply.
The Sex is like a freaking prized jewel these days.  That’s what happens when things are in high demand right? They become more coveted?   Somebody tell my husband that until the Extreme Tired lets up and this girl gets some energy back.

Friday Night Leftovers

• I really like the fun visitors ICLW brings to my blog. Thanks for visiting, ya’ll come back now – ya hear?! (yes, i know that is corny)
• Gianna is just a goofball these days. She spent last night brushing her babies hair. We also put said baby in the bathtub with her because, well, she was messy when she ate her nutrigrain bar. Gianna got so mad at me when I tried to take the wet baby from her so she could go to bed.  A little water never hurt anyone….
• I really do not like all the humidity we are having for the sole reason that it is forcing me to use our AC. I really do not like having to be cuddled under a blanket in the summer time.
• My last big project of the semester involves me narrating a powerpoint presentation that I gave last week. The one I gave was 30 minutes long. My narration can only be 10 minutes. That should be an easy task…..
• We have all wood floors in our house.  I am not a huge fan of sweeping. Those two things do not go together.
• I am jonesing for a new lens for my camera.  And a new fun camera bag.  and some camera lessons so I can take better pictures.
• Why do I stay up late every night? By late I mean until 11. I am always tired in the morning. Some people never learn….
• One of my coworkers is ridiculously behind the times technologically. I feel like if you are in the work force today - you should know what Microsoft Office is and how to use its components. Telling me you don't know what powerpoint is and not being able properly prepare a document in Word is not making me respect you as a peer.... For gawd sake, ELMO has email. You should be able to put together a simple powerpoint presentation. It is 2010 - get with it.
• I had other things I wanted to write here… and now I can’t remember what they were. Typical.

Visit Danifred to play along

Sometimes dinner can be dramatic

So we all have heard my many woes about how G doesn’t like to eat 99% of food.  But, the girl loves her some fruit.

Loves it so much she will shovel 10 pieces of strawberry into her mouth at once, because obviously some strawberry monster is going to eat them if she doesn’t.

Which leads to the dinner time drama. She deemed her eggs “ucky” and wanted only her strawberries and plums. And she wanted to eat them at warp speed.  Or pack them away in her cheeks for later like a chipmunk.

If you tell her “slow down Gianna” or “one bite at a time, Gianna” she makes faces like this while trying to sneak in an extra nibble:

I apologize in advance, little one, that you inherited my Ugly Crier Gene.  Fair warning – everyone will know when you are upset for your whole life. No hiding it.  If you look close you can see the alligator tears on her cheeks.

I may or may not have provoked her with a “slow down Gianna” or two so I could finally get this face on camera:

 

This face she offered up all on her own. I tell you – who knew so much drama was involved in trying to prevent choking?  She gave me the extra pout/cry/whimper when I said “stop crying so you don’t choke on your food”. 

I did the ultimate no-no in mommyhood disciplinary action - I laughed. She always laughs when someone else does. So she started to cheer up.

The she found her wa-wa, which always makes her happy.  And we were jamming to some Justin Bieber – which also makes her happy.

All the drama that was Thursday Night Dinner Time began and ended in about 10 minutes. 

Thankfully it ended on a higher note than it started with.

Wordless Wednesday

I took my daughter to an Italian Festival and all she ate was grilled cheese.

**welcome ICLWers! hope you enjoy my crazy section of the internet**